Only 30 some slots left!!!
As expected, the 300 slots for the Golden Mile are filling fast only 30+ left as I am typing this note, and the openings will be disappearing more quickly than kind words in the Heard-Depp trial. There are only seven days to go until the event, so sign up now before all the slots are filled. You may be thinking, “oh well, they will still let me register even if they fill.” Nay, nay my young Padawan, you will never be a Jedi lake swimmer with that twisted thought process. This event is very SWAG heavy with a race backpack, T-shirt, patches, bumper stickers, and much more, all of which have to be ordered well in advance. We only have 300 of the race swag goody bags, which I am told are better than the Academy Awards Goody bags, except they don’t have cocaine packets.Sign Up for the Golden Mile® Here
Remember there is no Lucky’s Lake Swim available on May 28th only the race, so join us for the race or volunteer.
We need more volunteers for the Golden Mile® Please keep in mind that the proceeds for this event goes to the Lake Cane Restoration Society which is a 501 c3 charity, which helps keeps Lake Cane swimmable.
Sign up to volunteer here: Volunteer Sign Up Here We are happy to report that your reward for volunteering will be in heaven. Some of us do need bonus points. Please sign up even if you don’t need bonus points, never mind, those folks have already signed up.
What’s Happing at the Golden Mile®
- $1500.00 Cash prize for setting either overall male or female course record.
- Men’s Record – True Sweetser 17:12.63
- Women’s Record – Carlie Rose 18:19.61
- Real Gold medals for the overall winners (Double the gold content of an Olympic Gold)
- Real Silver medals for overall runner ups 16 oz of sterling silver
- Masters Swimmer of the Ages Gold and Silver Medals – age handicapped division.
- Age group medals first through third from 10 and under through 90+
- Survivor medallions for all that finish
- Golden Mile Backpacks for all swimmers, filled with all kinds of SWAG including: T-shirt, patches, bumper stickers, yo-yos, racing caps, and more great stuff.
- Huge pancake breakfast with all the fixings after the swim.
- First time swimmers get to sign Lucky’s Lake Swim Wall of Fame and get even more SWAG.
- Yo-Yo Contest run by Duncan Yo-Yo professional Sean Perez – 8 time National Filipino Yo-Yo Champion
- Meet Rowdy Gaines race announcer and NBC Olympic Sportscaster and 3x Olympic Gold medalist.
What’s up with the Virtual Golden Mile® Swim!??
What if you can’t make the Golden Mile on May 28th because you will be partying so hard on the evening of the 27th that you will be in the ICU on the 28th – no worries you can still support the event by registering for the virtual Golden Mile®
There are two ways you can do the virtual Golden Mile®
- Register and swim on Friday night the 27th before you go out partying. You can use floatation, fins, snorkels, hand paddles, even wet suits (if you enjoy hyperthermia). You get all the SWAG and the survivor medallion, but no time or awards.
- Register and swim a mile elsewhere pool or open water on or before the 28th, you will receive all the all SWAG, but not the survivor medallion, time, or awards.
The Golden Mile® is a great warm up swim for the 33rd annual Jack Beattie Lake Swim and pancake breakfast on June 4. Everyone that does both Lucky’s Lake Swim and the Beattie swim on the same day will inducted into the dynamic duo Hall of Fame, and have your photos taken with other dynamic duo swimmers at the Beattie swim. We will post the photo, which confers internet immortality. Think of your own personal legacy, and do both swims the same day.
It’s time to sign up for the Golden Mile® !!!
Remember we cap out at 300 and we get a giant onslaught of entries in the last two weeks, so don’t get shut out! We are already 2/3rds full.
Sign up here now – do it now while you are thinking about it.
Easter is tomorrow morning, and we are expecting a Woodstock size crowd so carpool with friends (we are working on a mudslide).
Don’t forget to bring a blanket or chairs to sit on and your swimsuit and towel. You don’t have to swim to attend or eat. Family and children are welcome, but unsupervised children will be sent home with a duckling, a puppy with worms, and a kazoo.
The sermon will start at sunrise 6:58AM. Offerings will go to the Edgewood Children’s Ranch.
Yes, I have tested positive for COVID, and no, regardless of the rumors swirling about my Jet setting ways, I did not get it from Nancy Pelosi. Although, I have been contacted by the state department for close proximity one-on-one negotiation with Valdemar Putin. They say I am perfect for the job, but they only have a window of the next five days to set up a meeting. I am honored that the state department feels I have the unique qualities required for successful international diplomacy. However, I have respectfully declined due to the following state department dictator greeting protocol:
- When approaching President Putin, crouch down to make your mouths line up on the same plane, smile big, hyperventilate, do not lose eye contact as you advance and keep puffing.
- Cough in the palm of your hand; follow this with a firm handshake.
- Kiss each cheek and rub your alar rim and mucosa in his sideburns.
- Follow this with a forcible French kiss.
I, of course, have a problem with the firm handshake requirement as Putin’s grip is reported by TASS to have the strength of ten bears, and I don’t want to risk my underwater hockey-playing hand. So, I have requested the State Department give my apologies to Mr. Putin and please send him my regrets and a box of cigars. I saw a nice box sitting in a CIA warehouse on a dusty shelf labeled “operation mongoose” with a marker scrawled over the label saying, “no longer needed,” dated 11/25/16.
So, how does my positive COVID test affect the lake swim? Not at all. I will be self-isolating according to the current medical protocols, which change every 23 seconds. The swim goes on as usual, and I will wave at you from the house windows unless you are on my enemies list, and then I will jump out from behind a bush and greet you close and personal. Wait one darn minute! I now realize what the state department was trying to do, those shameless sly dogs. They didn’t care one whit about my international negotiating skills; they only wanted me to demonstrate that Putin didn’t have the hand strength of ten bears. So, I am on to you, state department; you must be an early worm to put one by me. I have read Jethro Bodine’s book how to be a double naught spy, so that’s how I figured your little plot out so quickly.
Currently, I am doing okay with only minor chest congestion. I was double vaccinated and boostered, plus I always wear a mask to protect my patients in my office. As you know, the vaccines don’t prevent infection or transmission of the virus, but they do help keep you out of the ICU and dying (I am counting on them being right on this one). I have been checking out many alternative treatments for mild covid infections. I have selected one that I feel will work well for my situation, massive doses of blackberry cobbler. Since none of the other alternative treatments have panned out so far, I figure this one won’t either, but the delivery route is more enjoyable. Just to be clear, I am talking orally, not IV or suppositories. Should I worsen, I will institute my DEFCON 1 plan which will be to go to the courthouse and officially change my birthday to 9/26/00.
I will be at EAT- PRAY-SWIM as this is a definite go. This is a sunrise service at 6:58 AM on Easter Sunday, April 17th. Please attend as Tom Welch will again be performing the sermon, and his ego needs a big boost. He has been living in the shadow of his superstar wife, who was selected as Orange County’s teacher of the year. Tom, who used to be 6’7″, has now shrunk down to 5’1″. You can’t possibly know what it feels like standing with your wife in front of a step and repeat banner and having the paparazzi say, “little man, take ten steps to the left,” and there are only eight steps to the edge of the podium. Doctors say some of the shrinkage might be reversible.
What do you need to bring?
- Family members
- A blanket or chairs to sit on.
- A swimsuit (we swim right after the sermon)
- An appetite (we eat after the swim. Our traditional pancake breakfast)
- All offerings go to the Children’s Ranch
Don’t forget to Sign up for the Golden Mile. The race is on May 28th. We are already over a third filled. Don’t wait until the last minute and get shut out. The swim is limited to 300, and all the proceeds go to the Lake Cane Restoration Society.
Lucky’s Lake Swim always has and always will be open to anyone that enjoys the love of swimming. We don’t care what country you were born in, your political party, race or religion, whether you are rich or poor, your age, your genotype, or how you identify yourself. The only thing that matters is the love of open water swimming.
HOWEVER: We do have divisions when setting lake swim records or winning awards in the Golden Mile® or the Rowdy and Lucky 1.5 K race. They are XY genotype (Formerly known as the male division) and XX genotype (Formerly known as the female division). Additionally, we have a Special Olympics Division. So again, we don’t care how you identify, but for awards and records, these are the divisions.
These rules are not new; the Golden Mile® has always had them in place, and you can see them in the FAQ section on the Golden Mile website.
Opinion statement from Lucky on the Lia Thomas transgender swimming issue.
Lia Thomas is, of course, welcome, to join us for our daily swims. I would love to have her join us for a swim, and our swimming community, with open arms, will welcome her. I’m sure she has some fascinating stories. However, she or other transgender women will not be allowed to set course records in the genotype XX divisions, only the genotype XY. Although having seen her times, she can set genotypic XY course records should she choose.
The NCAA and the International Olympic Committee have their own set of rules. They allow transgender males (genotype XY) that identify as women to compete against females (genotype XX) if they have had testosterone suppression for a year. Is this a good rule? Sure, if your goal was to get folks watching women’s events in the NCAA championships, Thomas’s swims broke all kinds of viewing records; otherwise a terrible rule. However, most competitive swimmers, male or female, believe this is unfair.
The proof is Lia Thomas winning the woman’s NCAA national championships this year in the 500 free. Lia, a genotype XY male who is 6′ 3″, grew up swimming as a male and competed for three years for Penn’s men’s swim team. As a male, he was an excellent swimmer making the Ivy league finals (4:18.7 500 free), but not a great swimmer as he couldn’t make NCAA cuts for men. After undergoing two years of testosterone suppression therapy, she began competing in the woman’s division and is now the woman’s 500 free NCAA National champion beating out Olympic silver medalist Emma Weyant.
If you read Cheryl Cooky’s article from NBC News Think she would have you believe that Lia Thomas was one of the best things to ever happen to women’s sports, and she should be celebrated.
Cheryl Cooky was never an athlete, but she might equate trying out for your high school gymnastics team her freshman year and quitting being equivalent to the average collegiate swimmer. Swimmers spend a lifetime training to exhaustion every day to be rewarded in college by spending 20 hours a week training and losing weekends to competitions while carrying a full college load. Yet, for the most talented college swimmers, their colligate career’s greatest honor is qualifying for the NCAA championships. Her lack of understanding of swimming is apparent in the first line of her article, “On Saturday, University of Pennsylvania swimmer Lia Thomas placed last in the 100-yard freestyle swim during the NCAA championships.” Lia did not finish last in the 100; she finished 8th place in the finals of a national championship meet which awards All American honors for that finish and scores eleven points for her team.
By Lia swimming, she has cost three deserving women swimmers all-American honors, took away Emma Weyant’s national title and three other women opportunities to swim in the finals and three more in the consolation finals, as well as affecting overall team scores. So why should this be celebrated?
Cheryl Cooky makes a living blasting the sports media for lack of coverage of women’s sports based on the ridiculous tenet that media controls what the consumer wants to watch. For years, she has espoused that nobody watches women’s sports is the sports media’s fault. From her position, I would assume that we don’t see underwater hockey on primetime sports networks because of the collusion of sports media giants against underwater hockey. Although perhaps it is because underwater hockey is the world’s worst spectator sport, and ESPN would take a financial bath televising it. Sports programming is about the money. It always has been and always will be. If you don’t believe me, check out how many men’s swimming, gymnastics and wrestling programs have been dropped in the last three decades from division 1 schools compared to the number of men’s basketball and football teams.
Cooky goes on to say, “Moreover, there is a lack of scientific evidence that conclusively demonstrates a direct link between testosterone and athletic performance.” I know, and the earth is flat, and the moon landing was faked. I will agree that if Cooky was given testosterone, it would not affect her athletic performance because you have to work out for it to have an effect.
Cooky is not a swimmer nor an athlete, and she cannot begin to fathom the pain that Lia Thomas has caused for many women swimmers. Clearly, she does not understand the biological differences in the development between genotypic XY and XX individuals.
Her allusions to the transgender sports issue being similar to the civil rights movement, the racial integration into sports, and Jackie Robinson “breaking the color barrier” are farcical at best. What ticks me off the most is that individuals like Cheryl Cooky have a national media voice where the rest of us don’t.
I respect Lia “Will” Thomas for his accomplishments as a male swimmer but have no respect for having a Y chromosome and taking glory and accolades from deserving female swimmers.
What should happen? Well, Lia didn’t break any NCAA rules and based on that, I would not strip her of her awards, but I would change the rules as they are unfair. The NCAA should division based on not whether a person identifies as a man or woman, but instead on having an XY or XX chromosomal genotype.
We should all seek to keep women’s swimming equitable and fair. Perhaps the more important concern should be the attack on freedom of speech. Coaches are afraid of speaking out in opposition for fear of losing their jobs; swimmers remain silent as they are scared for their future, and sports commentators are told not to give their opinions. I would defend Cheryl Cookie’s right to promote her ridiculous views to the end. Still, freedom of speech is not letting ivory tower academics have their say while canceling others opposing views through structural intimidation.
Please stand up for female genotype athletes; they deserve your support; write the NCAA and let them know how you feel.
Thirty-five swimmers braved the first swim of 2022 at Lucky’s Lake Swim. Although “braved” is not precisely the correct term to use, the water temperature was nearly 72 degrees. As a result, several of the folks wearing wet suits had to hop in the hot tub after the swim to cool down. Although there was a ponderance of black sausage swimmers, with the wonderful air and water temperatures, they were obviously making a fashion statement as wetsuits were not needed.
Five first time swimmers, Bud making 100K honors, Jim Sullivan makes his 1200 crossing milestone (all you get for that is to ring the big bell 12 times), and Seth Baetzold breaking his record (1st record-breaker for the year) with a time of 13:56 in the 25-29 age group. A busy morning for the lake swim.
We also saw the return of several swimmers that have been MIA for the last many months. New year’s resolutions and all. We shall see if those resolutions to start swimming again last until next Saturday.
Registrations for the Golden mile are now open! But, as the phoenix arises from ashes and fire, the Jay Madigan emerges from the lake muck on Golden Mile Registration opening day. You cannot vaccinate against a Jay Madigan. Your only hope is to register and register early. Otherwise, check beneath your bed every night, as, sooner or later, he will appear there with a sharpened quill pen, dripping with India Ink number 5, and a registration form. His discovery will be followed by his harsh cry of caw, caw … caw, caw all night long. Been there, done that, save yourself, register now.
We are now back to our regular swim schedule Mon-Fri 6:30 AM Saturday’s 7:45 AM.
The water temp is 72.8, which is warmer than the springs. But, folks, this is why we live in Florida. Even Lucky is still swimming in the lake.I can’t explain what a great photo op this is for you to irritate all your friends and family up north completely. Picture yourself standing in the lake in a speedo, fanning yourself, as it’s just too hot. Of course, your winterized friends and family will hate you. You, however, will feel great as Schadenfreude is the next best feeling after love.
Holiday Lucky’s Lake Swim Schedule
7:45 AM Saturday 18th
No Swim Sunday 19th
7:45 AM Monday 20th
7:45 AM Tuesday 21st
7:45 AM Wednesday 22nd
7:45 AM Thursday 23rd
7:45 AM Christmas Eve
No Swim Christmas Day
No Swim Boxer Day Sunday 26th
7:45 AM Monday 27th
7:45 AM Tuesday 28th
7:45 AM Wednesday 29th
7:45 AM Thursday 30th
7:45 AM New Year’s Eve 31st
7:45 New Years Day 2022
No Swim Sunday 2nd
6:30 AM Monday January 3rd back to the normal swim schedule.
The water temp is still hanging in the low 70s, but the lake now appears to be one big school of black sausage swimmers. It is still okay to swim without a wetsuit, as we see Lucky out there without one. Lucky serves as our wimp gauge. If Lucky has not retreated into his balmy, temperature-controlled, indoor swimming treadmill, and you are wearing a black sausage suit, you are by definition a wimp. Suppose Lucky is nowhere to be seen, except for the hot tub. In that case, those that continue to choose to swim without a wetsuit are to be revered and honored as real men and women, and they will have seats reserved at the table of the gods in the halls of Valhalla for when they pass to the other side from extreme hypothermia. To those, I say, “feast with Odin for eternity, die cold with your fins on.” For those in wetsuits – no feast for you.
And speaking of feasts, the Holidays are upon us, and it’s time to think about the extreme gustatory pleasures that are rapidly approaching. Of course, for all our maniac calorie counting athletes, this means more exercise must be done to counter the evil consumptions that will occur on T- day. What better way to justify that extra helping of dressing than a lake swim? As with tradition, Lucky’s Lake Swim will be happening on T-day morning to help counteract the sinful gluttony that will occur later in the day. For those of you that choose instead to sit at home watching the Macy’s Day parade, stuffing down caramel-covered apples and slices of warm pumpkin pie, a pox on your conscience.
Holiday Swim Times Thanksgiving week.
Monday 6:30 AM
Tuesday 6:30 AM
Wednesday 7:45 AM
Thanksgiving Day 7:45 AM
Friday 7:45 AM (Poker Night at Lucky’s House for the Lake Cane Restoration Society 6:15 PM)
Saturday 7:45 AM
Black Friday has finally been renamed Poker Night at Lucky’s.
We only have a few seats left. So please let Jay Madigan or Lucky know ASAP if you want a chair at Poker Night which is always fun.
- You don’t need to know how to play poker to get a seat. We will have a beginners training session.
- The $20,000 buy-in per chair has been reduced to $40. Due to this announcement, Tobey Maguire has pulled out of the tournament, and he will also not be bringing his friend Leonardo.
- There will be food and drinks.
- $300.00 first prize, $200.00 second place, $100.00 third place, 4th place gets a pat on the back and two attaboys.
- No six-shooters or pearl-handled derringers.
- The beginner/learning table starts at 6:15 PM; the tournament begins at 7 PM.
Deadline 1 Deadline for the Rowdy-Lucky 1.5K swim is tonight at Midnight. We have about 100 swimmers signed up so far for this fantastic race on Sunday at 7:45 AM. The predicted water temperature is . . . perfect. Don’t miss your opportunity. The Rowdy-Lucky 1.5K open water swim is a chip-timed race, and we have age group awards for this swim. Register Here.
Deadline 2 If you want to be guaranteed a t-shirt for the 5K Night-Ops Frogman swim, you must register by this Sunday. The price for the event registration goes up next week, and there is no shirt guarantee. Register Here.
Attention all volunteers for the Rowdy Lucky 1.5K swim: parking will be in the back of the house to the left of Lucky’s house as you look at the front. Volunteers, please arrive no later than 6:15 AM