I would like to thank everyone who sent me well wishes on my birthday; it meant a lot to me. I am blessed with many friends, and now several former friends who reminded me that at 67, I am considered elderly. I was pretty sure that was not the definition of elderly, so I looked it up.

“Age 65 and older. Traditionally, the “elderly” are considered to be those persons 65 and older.” WTF?
I can say that now, and other naughty words, because I am elderly, and we can get away with all that S*#T.

Those of you who wrote me all those wonderful letters, “Mi homework.”  Thanks, I am still grading them and should have them returned to your desks sometime before the next millennium. Four swimmers wrote in script, and I refused to read those letters as I didn’t want to let my 4th-grade teacher, Mrs. Groves, win.  She told me that everyone must learn to read and write script to succeed. I told her that the task was stupid and that I knew how to print, which should have been more than enough. Shortly after that conversation, I also had the opportunity to tell the principal about it. They may have won that battle, but I am in it for the long haul, and I can still win the war.  We are close to victory I can almost taste it.  

The zombie swimmer raised $2800 for the Rosen Aquatic Center’s step-in-to-swim program. Everyone had so much fun that they forgot it was for a good cause.

Is this really a good idea when you give it some thought?

Jake, our zombie prime along with his fierce dog kiwi. Only 5 survivors this year.

Jay dressed as poop! Which he felt was much scarier in the water than a zombie. He may be right, point taken, but he needs to quit wearing it to church.

Our first three survivors. Jack was the first out of the water, and will be our zombie prime next year. I can’t help but notice, low body fat must be an advantage in a zombie apocalypse. 

Best Zombie, in the costume contest, went to this highly synchronized dance routine, which is being now sued by the Michael Jackson estate and four spectators who experienced extreme psychological trauma. 

Lindsey takes home the sexist zombie award for the second year in a row. It’s nice to have a useful skill set.

Les wins the Most Bizzare zombie award, but was ultimately disappointed because he was shooting for the most sexy zombie.

The winner of the distance furthest traveled mug came all the way from Denver, which is a city where they require you to wear goggles inside your swimsuit, in case you were wondering what is hanging down from his right leg. 

Kathleen was the only female survivor this year. And she’s elderly too! 

Our final survivor arrived at 2 am. Everyone was gone and someone took his clothes, wallet and phone. I’m pretty sure he’s still in the lake.